CULTIVATING CHARISMA

Hi Friends,

Ten years ago I had a quarter life crisis. In 2004, I was living overseas, I’d just finished drama school in the UK and had come out of a long term relationship. I found myself (as you do) in New York City struggling with extreme uncertainty. At 25, I knew I didn’t want to be an actor anymore, I wanted to be a writer and work in film and theatre, but I didn’t know which country to choose or where to go next. I was in a major down place and the fear and anxiety was beyond overwhelming.

One day I went to The Met in NYC, and I sat down on a bench to take a break. Suddenly, I saw this stunning and dynamic woman, who quite literally looked like she had light radiating out of her. She was with four children and she was so excited about whatever it was she was talking about; it was as if she had sparks of positive energy flying off her and into the foyer of the museum. This is what charisma looked like and it was only after a few minutes of watching her engage with her children in such a high energy way, that I realised the woman was Annette Benning.

I have to say watching this charismatic person in action actually lifted me out of my dark place and to reengage with everything around me in a more positive way. I still think of that moment from time to time now that I’m a mother myself, and try to engage with my children in a high energy switched on way whenever I can (and of course, it’s not always possible).

I’ve met quite a few famous people in my time and I’ve seen quite a few around the traps, and not all of them have this thing called charisma. Yes, many people have it naturally (Simon Cowell describes it as if “there is one person in bright colour and everyone else is in black and white”)- but can it be cultivated? Apparently, yes it can. According to Forbes Magazine the 5 Qualities of Charismatic People are; 1) Self Confidence

2) Tell Great Stories (using humour, animation and conviction)

3) Having open and approachable body language 

4) They make the conversation about the other person

5) They are good listeners

Now isn’t that interesting? So here’s a little Charisma Challenge for you based on the Forbes List

1. Next time you go to a party or social gathering, focus on your body language being open and receptive. Smile.

2. When you strike up a conversation with somebody, make it all about them. Find out some interesting facts about them and try to make a quality connection

3. Don’t look at your phone or the clock.

4. Focus on remembering peoples names. Another quality of charismatic people is they tend to remember your name, and will use it immediately in the conversation

5. Try to have fun. Charismatic people tend to have a genuine quality that is evident in their presence.

Love Claire xx

It’s About Time

Hi Friends, 

Long time no blog. I’ve been busy emerging myself in the amazing talks from The Hay House World Summit. Wow, were there some amazing talks. My pick of the bunch was James Altucher, writer and entrepreneur, author of the book “Choose Yourself.” I was so inspired by his words and advice that I’m going to devote an entire blog to what he had to say, but what I really got from his talk and so many of the other inspiring speakers was the message “stop wasting time, stop doing things that are sucking your will to live…” Stop watching rubbish TV. One bit of TV I cannot abandon however, is The Voice…but that’s another story…

Okay, so here’s the exercise on making your time work for you…

1. On a fresh sheet of paper, write a list of everything you do/need to do in a week (examples- go to work, cooking, socialising, watching TV, exercising, quality time with partner, quality time with family, cleaning, sleeping etc…write it all down)

2. A little overwhelming, right? You do a lot! Now, next to each item, write the number of hours spent doing these things (e.g.- working 40 hours, cleaning 2 hours, socialising 3 hours, etc, etc)

3. Now take a look. Is there anything that needs to be switched around or changed? Is there a positive change that can be made- for example, more hours spent sleeping or exercising instead of watching TV or on Facebook? How would you like your life to look? Is there something that can be crossed out entirely and replaced with something more beneficial to your well being?

4. Now create a fresh list. The items you have to do/ want to do. Write down how many hours you now intend to spend doing each activity. For example, you may have only slept for seven hours a night (a total of 49 a week) but you know that for your health and well being you want to aim for 56 hours a week of quality sleep (8 hours per night) so now you’re going to go to bed an hour earlier. Create a better list/reality for yourself.

5. Now schedule it all into the diary. If you are in control of your time you’re going to have a greater sense of purpose and well being. 

Have a wonderful week empowering your schedule!

Love Claire xx

Your Ultimate Physical Environment

Hi Friends,

Here’s a fun creative exercise to think about your home and how you could make it into a sanctuary. It’s also designed to get your mind activated and to explore future visions for your ultimate physical environment. Enjoy!

1. Out of 10, how would you rate your current home?

2. How do you feel when you walk in the door?

3. What’s your favourite room or space in the house/apartment?

4. Have you ever stayed in a hotel or visited the home of somebody and been inspired?

5. Where is your ultimate location to live? Go ahead. Dream.

6. Think about your fantasy location and imagine your ideal home. Draw it. Google similar homes. Play.

7. What about your current home, if anything is similar to your day dream place and space?

8. Is there an easy change you could make to your current space that could link it to your day dream place/space? For example, if your dream home is a Balanise paradise, you could buy an orchid plant for your bathroom to remind you of that serenity. Or maybe you’d secretly love to live in an Amelie esque Parisian apartment; play the soundtrack and buy a red bed spread! The smallest of creative stretches can have a huge impact on the way you feel about your space.

9. What is your future vision for your home? Do you love where you live, but want to update? Do you want to move? Where are you at with your current space?

10. Try some intuitive feng shui. Walk into each room and see how you feel in the space. If you feel peaceful and tranquil or happy, then your space is working. If you feel agitated or stressed, it ain’t working’. Consider moving things around or simplifying spaces so there is little or no clutter. If something feels wrong in a room, then it shouldn’t be there. Rule of thumb, you’ve got to use it or love it, or else question why an object is there. 

The smallest of spaces can be enhanced by a plant or a bunch of irises. Put what you love and what brings you joy into your home and you, and all who enter it will feel joyful too.

Love Claire xx

 

Life Designing; Creating Your Ideal Life…today!

Hi Friends,

Many of us dream about achieving everything one day. The car, the dream home, the successful career, the perfect body; the list goes on…”one day, I’ll get there,” we tell ourselves. Well, what about today? Why don’t we take a little time out today to design our ideal life, based on what we already have?

I did this exercise with a friend recently, and asked her to rate the following areas of her life out of ten (ten being the highest,, if something sucks right now, give it a 1). Doing this exercise surprised my friend, because she realized, that a lot was already working in her life. For example, for the category of Physical Environment, she scored a 10. My friend loves and appreciates her 2 bedroom apartment. She loves the location, the Art Deco style, the rent is reasonable and she’s got it clean and organized. So it’s a 10. Yay! Romance was a 9, Money and Finances an 8, Personal Development a 9, Family and Friends a 9 and Fun and Joy an 8.

On the flip side, she scored 5 on Health and Fitness. So, I asked her, “what would it take to bring it to a 10?” The answer; more sleep, healthier food, an exercise routine. The next question, “what would it take to bring it to a 10 today?” The action steps included taking a walk on the beach , cooking a healthy dinner and going to bed an hour earlier. Snap! Instant improvement.

So here’s today’s exercise;
1. Under each category, give yourself a rating out of 10
Health and Fitness
Work and Career
Money and Finances
Physical Environment
Personal Development
romance
Family and Friends
Fun and Joy

2. Then, take a few moments to ask yourself, what would my life look like if every category scored a 10? Don’t write an essay, just a sentence or two will do.

3. Finally, choose one or two categories, preferably your lowest scoring categories and take 3 action steps TODAY! For example, maybe your finances suck. You score a 1. It’s a dismal state of affairs. What can you do to turn this around? Maybe one action step you can take is to borrow a financial classic from the library, (notice I said borrow, don’t buy!) like Napoleon Hill’s “Think and Grow Rich”. The second action step might be to make a mind map of how you can earn more money, the next might be to track your spending for a month (as in every cent you spend) in a small notebook, so at the end of the month you can review your spending and see what you can change.

4. By taking a few simple action steps today, in an area of our life that’s not working the way we want it to; we reclaim our power. As one of my gurus, Cheryl Richardson says “inactivity equals anxiety.” So let’s do it friends, let’s bring everything up to a 10! Enjoy!

Love from Claire xx

2014; Your Best Year So Far

Here’s a fun exercise to do as we step into a new year.

Get a piece of paper and divide it into three columns. At the top of the page, write the title; “2014; My Best Year So Far”

* In column 1, write the title “What I’m Leaving in 2013”

* Come up with a list of ten things that aren’t working for you in your life right now; (number them down the column); examples might be over eating, complaining, one way friendships, watching bad TV, overspending, over eating etc.

* Then, in column 2, write the title “What I’m bringing to 2014); this list should be things that you’re doing now that are working for you. You may be doing these activities and behaviours in small doses, but you know that they are beneficial for your well being; the list might include; a meditation practice, drinking 2 litres of water per day, focusing on the present moment, eating lots of fruit and vegetables and reading inspiring texts (if you can have 7-10 things on your list, that’s great)

* Then finally, in column 3, write the title “What I wish to manifest”- write four statements that contain positivity and empowerment, examples might include; “I have boundless energy and am easily maintaining my goal weight; exercising daily and eating healthy food and drinking lots of water” and “I am thrilled to be financially abundant, doing wonderful work that serves others and utilizes all of my wonderful talents”

* After the lists are complete, take the first list and destroy it. Release those items that are not serving you and focus on what is working for you, what you want more of and what you want to happen in the upcoming year.

* I’d love to know if you enjoyed this exercise and found it beneficial to planning an amazing program for yourself in the New Year

Best wishes,

Claire